Dylan: 6 Months Old

Dear Dylan,

The name Dylan has other people it’s attached to, like Dylan Thomas and Bob Dylan. But in my mind it has so quickly just become YOUR name, even as I struggle to think of you as a person, distinct from “baby” and distinct from me. When you were inside me you were just an extension of me. Now, at 6 months old, I’m just an extension of you. Joshua gets these deep body giggles from you, but so often you barely even seem to notice I’m there as you climb about me and look around me. But if I move away, you immediately tense up, begin to protest, and try a little desperately to get back closer to me. When I move in and touch you again, you immediately relax, and I see that part of you is missing when I’m gone, even as you settle right back into the work of separating us, learning the world and growing and going. I’m so honored to be here for you and to help you as you go.

I love every single thing about you. You have two little teeth coming in and your hair grows like a mohawk. You’ve learned to pull up on things, cruise around, find neat things to play with on tabletops and shelves, go up the stairs, and rolly-poly back down them. Your favorite book is Longjohns. You love to ride in the Moby (or any other baby carrier, really). You’ve just started noticing the cats, and you find them delightful. You’ve been to two burns; you’ve been to Iowa to meet extended family. You’ve just started to try foods – banana is your least favorite, but grapes in the mesh feeder are a big hit.

Our favorite song is Moves Like Jagger. You love my moves like Jagger, and you love my singing.

I call you Tiny Baby and Baby-Kind (as in, what kind of person are you? A baby-kind.) We spend so much time together, and I love every single minute. I never get tired of hanging out with you. I love breastfeeding, carrying you around, and sleeping with you side-by-side.

Every time you see me your face breaks out in a great big smile, and it is the most wonderful thing in the whole world.

My love for you is huge and limitless, a vast expanse of joy in my mind.

Thank you for you.